The Ladies' Room
Oct 08 '02
The Bottom Line "If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be sweet and wipe the seat."
Gotta go...gotta go...gotta go!!!
When the urge to "go" strikes, we're not always in the comfort and cleanliness of our own private homes. We can be at work, the grocery store, the mall, a restaurant, or on the interstate. The urge is there . . . and keeps getting more urgent by the minute. At those unfortunate times when we're away from home, we have but one option . . . a trip to (GASP!) The Ladies' Room.
Enter . . . IF YOU DARE!
Gingerly, we open the door to Stall Number One. OOPS! Can't go in that one, there's yellow drops all over the seat. Better try Stall Number Two. Yep, you got that right . . . Stall Number Two is appropriately named since someone else's "number two" is floating in the ol' ceramic bowl!
Stalls Three and Four are no better than the first two. One of the bowls has used wads of toilet paper in it, wondering why the nice "lady" who visited last forgot to flush it. The other stall has not only tinkle spray and droplets all over the seat, but a used, unwrapped, there-for-all-to-see sanitary pad poking out the top of the receptacle. Eeeewww!!!
I'm sorry . . . I thought the sign said "Ladies' Room!"
C'mon gals. We're ladies . . . not pigs! And in case it never occured to you, we're not men either. Which means we weren't given the same anatomy as the guys. Which means a toilet was designed with a seat to sit on . . . not hover above. Duh!
Where's the consideration?
I, for one, am sick and tired of having to play cleaning woman nearly every time I enter a public restroom. After gathering a large handful of tissue (and oftentimes two handfuls), I reluctantly and carefully clean some stranger's "leftovers" from the seat . . . just so I can sit down in comfort. As for the stalls containing "Lincoln Logs" or other repulsions, I refuse to go in them unless it is a dire emergency.
As a lady, I resent going into public restrooms to find them in deplorable condition. Business establishments can't begin to keep up with all the nasty mess too many of us leave behind. With that in mind, as well as consideration of the next person coming in behind you, we each need to do our part in preserving the cleanliness of these rooms.
You CAN'T get disease from a toilet seat!
Well, almost. That is if the seat is clean! The vast majority of diseases, including STDs and AIDS, cannot be transmitted by sharing toilet seats. Sure there are germs . . . but they are everywhere . . . not just on the seat, but the toilet and door handles, the sinks, the faucets, you name it. So what to do? Wash your hands! It's that simple.
It pays to be informed. If you're still a bit uncertain about catching something from a toilet seat, you can check out many websites including the following:
http://www.joes-sanitation.com/adults.html
http://www.druginfonet.com/faq/faqtoils.htm
http://pub95.ezboard.com/fteenlinkcommunityfrm8.showMessage?topicID=27.topic
Still a bit uncertain?
If you're still not convinced, then go ahead . . . pretend you're a man. Just be sure to learn how to do it RIGHT. There's a whole website out there devoted to teaching women how to "pee standing up." Check it out (but be warned, this contains some very graphic descriptions and illustrations once you really start looking around on it):
http://www.restrooms.org/standing.html
Just be sure and practice at home first. When you get your aim perfected, then please, feel free to stand, hover, whatever you need to do to avoid sitting on that frightful public toilet seat.
However you choose to do it . . .
. . . keep in mind the signs that were taped to the stall doors at an office I worked at long ago: If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be sweet and wipe the seat.
And for goodness sakes, FLUSH the darn thing.
(NOTE: While I was working on this piece, I happened to run across a similar review by Epinons member papbear, written on June 21, 2002 and titled "Flush it!" It appears the guys have their problems, too . . . and "pap" and I have already emailed eachother, comparing notes. Try his review for more laughs---or is that tears?---from a man's perspective):
http://www.epinions.com/content_2714411140
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Epinions.com ID:
katybrighteyes
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Member: Katy
Location: Virginia
Reviews written: 13
Trusted by: 148 members
About Me:
Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. ~MarkTwain
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