Keeping My Ruddy, Trembling, Excited, High-Fiving Hands Inside the Boat
Written: Mar 02 '08
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Product Rating:
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Pros: dark, cool, detailed, magical, all ages, somewhat lengthy (17 minutes)
Cons: other people aren't always perfect guests, ride isn't completely immune to mechanical problems
The Bottom Line: Pirates of the Caribbean is a signature Disney theme park attraction for a reason: it's imaginative, immersive, and restive.
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| Liffey's Full Review: Pirates of the Caribbean - Disneyland |
I've been on long leave from Epinions, and every time my husband (a passionate Games Advisor) watches me write another review on my web site, he wonders why I don't port these musings over to Epinions, where more consumers are likely to read them and benefit.
Well, darling, this is me tentatively tipping a toe into the old waters, just for you.
Me, I don't like reviews that read like an uncited paraphrasing of either the corporate web site or Wikipedia. If you want to know the usual trivia, that Pirates of the Caribbean at Disneyland is a dark ride, or the last attraction that Saint Walt oversaw, or that it opened in 1967, we're not going to have a lot of patience for each other. Those are all valid tidbits to seek out, but one of the reasons I eventually wandered away from Epinions was because of the perception that every review should contain every possible fact, as opposed to occasionally focusing on a more narrow audience.
(That, and the Floopy debacle. If you know what I'm talking about then, my my, you have been around awhile. Salutes all around!)
So, it is my hope that simply sharing my experiences will make up for not mentioning that there are 122 audio-animatronics in the attraction, or that the first drop angle is 21 degrees, or even that there used to be real skeletons in the displays.
First thing, the queue usually moves relatively fast. You know how "Standby Wait Times" at Disney parks are often complete lies? The conventional wisdom is that Disney wants you to brace yourself for a 45 minute wait, then be super-happy when you're adjusting your seat belt in 30 minutes. This is especially true of Pirates. Resist wariness when both queues are out the door, as long as there appears to be some movement. On a crowded day, this is still one of the fastest movers.
Next, if you use the LCD screen on your camera during the ride, everyone will hate you. They sell these little voodoo dolls over behind the Pinocchio Haus, and people can buy them in economy batches of 10, and so you can bet you'll have a pin-tingly headache by the end of the ride if you break the atmosphere with your perplexing inability to use the viewfinder. Or, put away the camera and sit back and enjoy the ride. Someone else has already taken a better video and put it on YouTube, believe me.
Some of what I said above may be technically untrue. My point is that bright-as-buttons LCD monitors are a problem on many dark rides, and it seems none more so than Pirates. I know you would never be a Dorky McDorkins, but I want you to be prepared for the possibility that others will. Whether you choose to stealthily cough insults at that person or (try) to look the other way is your own moral decision. Just give it some thought before you go, because when Sartre said that Hell is Other People, he wasn't just muttering into his absinthe. Families sometimes get stressed on vacation; I'm just trying to keep you from grabbing a cutlass from robo-Jack Sparrow and letting the red rage take over. Have a deep breathing exercise ready.
Third, there is a water fountain in the queue as you go up and around the ramp to enter the building. Cold, free water beats the $2.49 bottled sodas when all you need is a sip.
Fourth, you will not get wet. I've seen people in ponchos more than once, people who seem dismayed afterward. Keep hopeful expectations set at "Sedate Open-Mouth Astonishment" and, a couple of bonus "Woot!"s aside, you'll be grand. (Okay, you may get a tiny splash on you, but it's twee, I promise.)
Fifth, look at the murals as you enter the building. They're neat, in the older style of Disney animation.
Sixth, your boat has a name. If you are a scrapbooking kind of person, this is just the kind of detail that will set you apart at the next crop-n-hop. (Or, you could just enjoy noticing this.)
Seventh, both sides of the boat are equally good for seeing everything. That's really all I can say about that. If you're the kind of person who enjoys overplanning (hello, friend!), this is one decision you can leave to the gods.
Eighth, thar be chattymouths ahead, matey!. The thing about Disneyland is that it's full of locals who have been 5,621 times, and that was just last week. Sometimes, some of these locals are so used to the attractions that they turn them into their own living rooms, chatting with friends or on cell phones while the rest of us are drifting through the Blue Bayou, trying to be lured into dreams of fireflies and waterfall grottos. As with the LCDs, you'll notice it more on a tranquil, dark ride like this. Unlike the LCD people, it's easier to shame the talkers. Now, I have an advantage, because I'm a high school teacher, but you can spend any wait time in the queue preparing a perfectly effective withering glance.
Why not give equal time to the positive? Because at Disneyland, you never need to practice a smile - it just happens! (Awww.) And Pirates of the Caribbean will bring you many smiles, from its puffs of cannon blasts to its drapery flames. (Note that seeing the movie is not a prerequisite for amazement.)
And now I must apologize. This is almost a thousand words, and I set myself a 300-word limit for my return to the e-pining fold. Grr! It must be a little of that Disney Magic(tm) sneaking in; it's always so full of surprises!
Recommended:
Yes
Best Suited For: Families Best Time to Travel Here: Anytime
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Epinions.com ID: Liffey
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Reviews written: 79
Trusted by: 71 members
About Me: I like thinking.
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