Fantasy & Science Fiction - June 2006
May 24 '06
The Bottom Line Probably the worse issue of the year, but that doesn't mean it's not worth reading. Just not worth drooling over.
Fantasy & Science Fiction - June 2006
The Stories
"Animal Magnetism" - by Albert E. Cowdrey (novelet) 22 pages
"Counterfactual" - by Gardner Dozois (novelet) 19 pages
"Why the Aliens Did What They Did to that Suburb of Madison Wisconsin" - by Tim McDaniel (short story) 3 pages
"Hallucigenia" - by Laird Barron (novella) 65 pages
"Terms of Engagement" - by C.S. Friedman (short story) 9 pages
"The Protectors of Zendor" - by John Morresy (novelet) 22 pages
The June issue is not a classic by any stretch of the imagination. It's not bad, and I wasn't actively offended like I was last issue, but I wasn't that impressed either. The problem is that I didn't really care for the centerpiece of the issue, Laird Barron's "Hallucigenia." With so much of the issue taken up by one sub-par story, the rest of the issue suffered. In fact, I enjoyed the shorter stories a lot more. Ending with a lesser John Morresy story didn't help, either. Still, I'm not sorry I read all of the stories, and I didn't have the desire to skip any of them, so that's a definite plus. Here's hoping for better next month.
The stories
"Animal Magnetism" - by Albert E. Cowdrey
A gay tax preparer named Henry Greene is having a tough time. It's mid-March, so the extremely busy tax season is upon him. His lover has just left him (the lover that both his sister and his old dog never liked anyway) and he's extremely depressed. His sister, an advice columnist, suggests he get a dog for companionship while he gets over the break-up. But it might be his mind breaking up, as "Trixie," his new dog, seems to have some other attributes. Like, for instance, turning into a woman every once in a while. Is tax season getting to him? Or can Trixie help him find what he's been looking for all this time? This is kind of cute, but not a standout tale. Cowdrey's characterization is spot on, catching Henry's dweebishness (yes, I just made that word up), his sister's concern, and the surreal nature of Henry's encounters with Trixie. I'm sure the irony of an advice columnist who doesn't really listen to people was intentional too, with Henry's sister missing some obvious slips on Henry's part when he's trying hard not to reveal what is really going on to her. I could have done without the references to gay sex (not actual sexual scenes, but casual asides), but those are personal preferences and certainly not faults in the story. A harmless story that didn't grip me that hard, but was still enjoyable.
Counterfactual" - by Gardner Dozois
What if a reporter in an alternate history were writing a story of his own? What if it was an alternate history that portrayed history as what really happened in our world? Dozois, former editor of Asimov's magazine, gives us a bit of that. A reporter in a world where Robert E. Lee never surrendered, but instead took his army into the mountains, with other Confederate armies following suit, shows us an occupied American South in the years between World War I and World War II (the former of which America stayed out of). Cliff is on a train ride down to Alabama, for a ceremony that will eventually result in Alabama's return to the Union after all these years. The South is economically depressed because Confederate rebels and have been setting off bombs, shelling towns, and executing collaborators for years, and it's hoped that this will help Alabama get back on its feet. But Cliff imagines a world where Lee actually did surrender and Lincoln was not assassinated at his second inauguration, and wonders how different it would be from the one he's familiar with. But reality intrudes at the harshest times, killing any progress that's been made recently, and making Cliff wonder all the more what would have happened. This is a wonderful story with a marvelous twist on the alternate history genre, apparently sprung from a quote of Lee's. Dozois does a great job with it, capturing the characters perfectly and revealing bits and pieces of the world as the story goes along. I'd love to see more stories in this kind of world, but I would certainly understand if this is a one-off.
"Why the Aliens Did What They Did to that Suburb of Madison Wisconsin" - by Tim McDaniel
This is a very short story about two sex addicts who are bored with all the "conventional" stuff. You know: playing Bill & Monica, playing torturer and prisoner, or Shrek and Donkey (don't ask). They want to be normal, but they're not, and their sex lives are getting boring. But then something drops in, seemingly built for both of them. But it may be more than they're ready for. This is very funny mainly because of the implications involved (some of the statements just come out of left field and are hilarious because of that, like "getting the laminating machine up and running again"). It's a perfect length, as it couldn't support any more, but it's definitely worth a chuckle or two.
"Hallucigenia" - by Laird Barron
Wallace Smith, scion of a rich family, self-made man and adventurer who has let it all go to pot, is enjoying a drive with his new wife, Helen. Helen is the daughter of a rival family, and both families have pretty much disowned them. The car dies outside a farm in rural Washington, and when they go investigating (Helen eager and Wallace reluctant), they happen upon some weirdness in the barn. Something that looks like a huge wasp nest is hanging from the ceiling and strange graffiti all over the walls. An unfortunate incident with a horse leaves them both with horrible injuries, though Wallace is still mobile. As Helen continues to deteriorate, Wallace becomes increasingly obsessed with the farm, and the strange family who owned it. He also starts hallucinating monsters haunting his garden. Or are they hallucinations? Things begin weird and then move on to bizarre, as Wallace discovers that monsters may very well exist. One of the more popular F&SF stories of last year was Laird Barron's "The Imago Sequence" (May 2005). I loved that story, despite not really being a horror fan. However, "Hallucigenia" almost seems old hat in comparison. Barron definitely packs on the atmosphere, and it is disturbing (though nowhere near as disturbing as "The Imago Sequence," but none of it really gripped me enough to call it good. It does succeed well enough that the length made me decide to stop reading, but I can't say that it's anywhere near the previous story. I didn't care that much about the characters and some of the infodumps (serving both Wallace and the reader) dragged on a bit long.
"Terms of Engagement" - by C.S. Friedman
Noted fantasy author C.S. Friedman provides this modern-day tale about a woman who forms a truce with the cockroaches in her apartment. She will make sure she turns on a light and wait a few moments before entering any room, and they will agree scurry out of the light while she's waiting, so that she doesn't have to see them. She won't search for them to kill them, but they're fair game if she catches them. It works for her, but her boyfriend thinks she's completely nuts. But she may have the last laugh. Because the allowance for dealing with those not following the rules goes both ways. I didn't think much of this story at first, but the more I read of it (and it is pretty short), the better I thought it was. It's an intriguing idea, with a wonderful twist ending that, I have to admit, I didn't really see coming (whether that says something about me or not, I don't know). There's not a lot of characterization, but what there is works.
"The Protectors of Zendor" - by John Morresy
Kedrigern, the wizard, makes another appearance in a Morresy story. This time, he's responding to a request from the king of Zondor, a man who calls himself Durmuk the Benign. Kedrigern, of course, doesn't have a very good opinion of him, and he's extremely reluctant to respond to Durmuk's request to help save the kingdom, but Kedrigern's wife thinks they have to make sure he's not lying. They stumble upon a young woman and her infant, said infant being under a horrible curse by a Bog Fairy that every person (other than the baby's mother) who hears the infant cry will go insane. After saving her from the mob and asking her to wait for them so he can help her, Kedrigern continues on to Zendor to find a weak king and a power-hungry cousin fomenting war for his own reasons. Kedrigern, of course, must come up with a solution to both problems before blood is shed on both sides. I've always enjoyed Morresy's Kedrigern stories (which makes it doubly sad that he passed away recently, so we won't be getting any more once the already-completed stories are published). They are extremely light, but still enjoyable. Unfortunately, this one is just a bit too light and obvious. Once the problems in Zendor were spelled out, the ending was pretty obvious, at least in the abstract (the details were slightly different than I had suspected). Kedrigern's wife seemed a little more trusting than she should be, as she wants to give Durmuk's cousin the benefit of the doubt despite how obvious he's being. Basically, Morresy makes the story too black and white for the reader, and then has the characters not treat it that way. I was getting increasingly frustrated with both wizards. Not one of Morresy's best.
The Articles:
"Books to Look For" - by Charles de Lint
The Black Angel - by John Connolly
Midnighters 2: Touching Darkness - by Scott Westerfeld
Midnighters 3: Blue Noon - by Scott Westerfeld
"Musing on Books" - by Michelle West
The Wave - by Walter Mosley
States of Grace - by Chelsea Quinn Yarbro
Disappearing Nightly - by Laura Resnik
"Films" - by Lucius Shepard
After a few relatively mild comments about Tristan and Isolde, Shepard rips a new one in Uwe Boll's latest video game flick, Bloodrayne
“Curiosities” – by Bud Webster
The Quest of the Gole by John Hollander (1966)
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