When You Live Near the RailRoad Tracks....
May 11 '00
Seven children in the family doesn't seem like all that much to me, and having been one of the seven in mine-I guess that means I'd know. Others thought it was though, people can be so rude.
As a child, I remember when anyone made a comment about it to my Daddy, he'd always say the same thing. We lived near the railroad tracks and he'd say, "Well, when that damn train rolls through at 5 AM and wakes you, it's too early to get up and too late to go back to sleep...".
And that's what I told anyone that made a big deal about it to me. "Well, when that train..." Never understood why my teacher didn't like me to talk about the train.
Not everyone decides to have a certain number of children. Sometimes it just happens-and it doesn't always have anything to do with not being "careful". Be it intended, religious reasons, or just that your parents are as fertile as the Nile Crescent-having more children than average is nothing to consider odd. Families that are less than wealthy are occasionally looked down on without reason-and that's a sore point with me. Sure it's hard, but being a good parent always is-whether you have 1 kid or 10, a "successful" family, and a happy one, rests on your "way" not your number.
The drawbacks are obvious-
Sure, I could have lived without having to share one bathroom with the whole bunch of them, and sharing a room wasn't always fun. (Yes, many times my sister and I "divided" the room like a bad sitcom). I suppose more kids means less "stuff" in most families too. Or wearing clothes someone else already grew out of. But the important things were not shared, just combined.
Most parents that have had a second child know that the love you have for them is never divided between them, but multiplied, for you and for them. It defies logic, to be able to love more than one person with all your heart, but it's like this amazing reservoir that is always full. No matter how much you give, or how many you give it to-always FULL!
In a larger family, there may be less "one-on-one" for each child, but the attention gained from the other siblings more than makes up for that.
Never lonely-always someone to play with, to learn from, tag along with, barrow from, or annoy...
As for the Middle Kid getting lost in the shuffle, I disagree. Four of Seven, I had:
Someone to learn from, and someone to teach
Someone to make me laugh, and someone to make laugh
Someone to protect me, and someone to protect
A brother who taught me how to slide in home, a sister to giggle in the dark with, someone to tell secrets to. Someone to help me with math, teach me to whistle, and trade comic books with. Enough brothers and sisters to build a fort out of tree branches in an hour, or play a game of touch football in the yard. An audience to applaud when I did a backflip, and a ready made support group to share the not so great stuff with.
Sure, I left out the fights and the disagreements and the getting teased when I got my first bra-because it's the other stuff I remember so clearly.
I can't compare having many siblings to having few or none, or say one way is better than another- because I only know what I know. This: How we raise our children is more important than how many children we raise.
I give my own Mother credit for making all of her children feel special as individuals, and loved with all her heart.
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teddiec
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