flash-hammer's Full Review: Varan the Unbelievable
Plot Details: This opinion reveals major details about the movie's plot.
As a general thing, I'm really quite against tampering with foreign movies for their release in Western markets. I mean, I'm all for the necessary translations that subtitles or dubbing provides, but editing the movie to alter it's plot and removing footage, for reasons other than censorship(although that's a whole other kettle of fish...) is, in my mind, butchering the product.
One instance where a heavily edited American version of a foreign movie worked is Godzilla: King of the Monsters. While the original Japanese version of the film, titled simply Gojira, stands head and shoulders above it, the people behind the Americanisation still managed to create a very entertaining movie, and retained most of the monster action.
However, the Americanisation of the same studio's later monster movie, Daikaiju Baran into it's American equivalent, Varan the Unbelievable, is less an act of editing, and more an act of sheer sodomy.
Perhaps an introduction is necessary, Toho, one of Japan's major movie studios, who were responsible for The Seven Samurai, released their, and Japan's, first giant-monster movie, Gojira in 1954, to a huge success. American distributors spotted the potential for the film overseas, and after purchasing the rights, they re-edited and inserted new footage with Perry Mason star Raymond Burr, to make it more accessible to American viewers, and released it 2 years later to a great success, not just in America, but Worldwide.
After making a quick, and not totally successful sequel with 1955's Gojira no Gyakushu, which arrived in America almost 5 years later as Gigantis the Fire Monster(keep in mind that as successful as the first movie was, nobody knew Godzilla would be such an enduring, and endearing, cinematic presence at this point in time), and it would be seven years after it's creation before Toho returned it's most famous creation to the screen in 1962's King Kong Vs. Godzilla, which also recieved a pretty bad Americanisation job, but was pretty bad to begin with.
However, in these 7 years, Toho created several original movies, including excellent Sci-Fi movies like The Mysterians, but also created 3 Kaiju Eiga to see if they could repeat the success of their first. Easily the best was their first attempt, 1956's Rodan, although 1961's Mothra was also entertaining. Inbetween the two, in terms of time, was 1958's Daikaiju Baran, which was to all extents and purposes a B-Movie, with the studio's B cast playing major roles. It was originally scheduled to be a joint American production, funded by ABC, to be broadcast exclusively on Television on both sides of the pacific. Despite the fact the studio had began working with colour movies, it was to be in Black and White, mainly due to the fact it would be relegated to that medium on television anyway. However, ABC pulled out just as production was due to begin, but Toho decided to go ahead anyway, and even opted to release the movie theatrically in it's homeland, where it didn't exactly set the box-office on fire, but it did a respectable run.
Jump 4 years into the future, and in 1962, possible spurred on by the King of the Monsters clashing with his simian rival, the overseas rights to the picture were purchased. The decision was made to give the movie similar treatment to what Godzilla's debut feature recieved, with The Incredible Melting Man star Myron Healy and various Japanese-American stars shooting new footage that completely alters the plot, and the main characters of the Japanese version, as portrayed by Kozo Nomura and Ayumi Sonoda, reduced to having 1 line between them(she screams his, original Japanese, name).
The movie follows Healy as he portrays military Scientist Jim Bradley, who is researching a means of purifying salt-water. He is practicing this at a remote mountain lake outside of Oneda, and helping him in this is his secretary-wife Anna(Tsuruko Kobayashi - Cry for Happy), who provides him with emotional support, and Captain Kishi(Clifford Kawada - Suicide Battalion), who helps with all the military related details.
The reason the armed forces are required is that the one village that is near the lake is home to a group of stubborn, to a violent extent, locals, who refuse to leave their home, and believe that their devil-god, the 'Obaki' will emerge from the lake and destroy the world if Bradley puts his chemical into the lake.
Naturally he ignores them, and this anti-saline chemical is launched into the lake, at which point they learn that the Obaki is very real, and he soon rears his head and leaves the lake to destroy the village, before disappearing into the sea, and making his way towards Oneda. With the entire Japanese military proving futile at stopping him, Jim Bradley and his chemicals may be the last hope the world has of stopping this unbelievable creature.
I feel I should get this out of the way from the get-go, the American print of Varan the Unbelievable absolutely stinks. Now keep in mind that Daikaiju Baran was a pretty formulatic and unexciting Kaiju Eiga to begin with, but this absolutely wretched butcher-job of a print is really quite unnacceptable.
For a start, before I even look at the plot. The US version clocks in at 17 minutes shorter running time than the original Japanese flick. Thats a pretty harsh editing job to begin with, but when you count just how much the Healy footage hogs the screen, I wouldn't be surprised if only about 20 minutes of the original movie actually appears in this debacle.
So not only are the main characters from the movie reduced to miniscule roles, but the monster himself, never actually referred to as Varan at any point during the movie, gets a real shafting. Varan was never Toho's greatest creation, looking like a cross between Godzilla and his first foe Anguirus, walking both bipedal and quadruped at points, but having a more Godzilla-esque body, but sporting an Anguirus-like spiky crown, and a single row of spikes down his back. Varan, who could easily have passed as a disposable villain on an Ultraman show, had one claim to fame: flight. In the original movie, to get to the sea, Varan spreads his arms, and a membrane appears, not unlike that of a flying squirrel, and he takes flight. While this element was under-explored in the original, it was easily the film's most memorable scene, which was really the only thing keeping it from being just another lame Godzilla wannabe. For christ knows what reason, American distributors decided people wouldn't want to see the film's one memorable scene, and instead we got more Myron Healy.
What makes this all the worse to take is the footage of Healy. This is boring, pointless cack as he talks to himself a lot, talks about his scientific importance, and is generally a condescending jerk to any and everyone he encounters. While this sounds like it might by quite amusing, it isn't, it's just boring. Akihiko Hirata's character, who was responsible for creating the means to destroy the monster, is completely erased, and it's Healy's character who becomes responsible for the monster's demise. The film tries too hard to make Healy's jerk seem heroic, and it just hurts the film even more.
Acting in this version basically consists of Kobayashi doing well at being a far too accepting wife, Kawada playing a fairly drab but passable soldier and Healy's condescending jerk routine, which he seems very good at, but not very good at being a hero.
These are really the only 3 characters it's worth talking about, because the rest were often playing roles completely different to what they are portrayed as here, and even then I think those three are the only characters who actually have any substantial lines.
Possibly the most criminal thing they could have done to the movie, toyed with Akira Ifukube's score, which is one of the great composer's best, and naturally they almost completely removed it. His brilliant piece, which resurfaced in many Godzilla movies, is relegated to a faint noise in the background in a handfull of scenes, I don't think they even bothered coming up with another score, it's just there is so much footage of Healy walking around talking rubbish that didn't require music, so the soundtrack is minimal.
Special effects are easily amongst Eiji Tsuburaya's least impressive. The miniatures are very impressive, as always, although you hardly see them here, but Varan himself is a real mixed bag. I've always felt his design idea was really cool, and that the really eerie glow his spines constantly give off is an awesome effect, not to mention his spiky head is one of Toho's coolest. But the realisation of him is far from their best. It's easily possible to see parts of the suit flapping up, probably at the area where the actor portraying him entered, and when he stands up it reveals that they couldn't be bothered adding any detail to his underbelly, and his neck doesn't sit right in this position.
When on all fours, Varan actually can look pretty cool, although it can depend on the lighting, which is, it has to be said, pretty shoddy, and far too dark. With the movie's most unique scene easily being an underwater shot of him as depth-charges are dropped around him, which is actually pretty cool. A lot of the military footage in the original was stock from the first Godzilla picture, but it was actually spliced in well, but to be honest I can't tell if any of it has survived the American edit.
To be completely honest, I see nothing to recommend Varan the Unbelievable on, unless you are looking for some form of example of just how bad film editing can get. It's a dull, slow, overly dark exercise in tedium that actually succeeds in making Daikaiju Baran, which wasn't exactly a hoot in itself, look like a classic piece of cinema. The funny thing about the entire exercise that was this Americanisation, is that Daikaiju Baran was a pretty American-esque monster movie to begin with. Toho were known for giving their monsters character, but Varan is pretty boring really, just another prehistoric throwback, the kind that were more popular on American screens. It was very by the numbers, and really made me think more of movies like The Beast From 20,000 Fathoms than Gojira.
To cut a long story short, Varan the Unbelievable sucks. It doesn't deserve to be put in the same boat as any other Toho related movies, and I would advise fans, if they must see the monster, to track down a copy of the original version of the movie, it's much better. This would be Varan's last major venture in the movies, while he had a cameo in Destroy All Monsters, it was actually the puppet used for the flying scenes in the Japanese original, because the suit, which wasn't great at the time of making the movie, had aged so badly it was deemed un-usable. Strangley, Varan did make an appearance in the Nintendo NES game Godzilla: Monster of Monsters, alongside other oddities like Mogera(from The Mysterians) and Gezora(from Yog! Monster from Space) ahead of more traditional Toho favourites like Rodan or even more obscure, but more Godzilla related beasts like Ebirah. He was actually scheduled to make an appearance in director Shusuke Kaneko's Godzilla, Mothra, King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All Out Attack, but Kaneko was told to remove him by Toho, as they didn't see him as being bankable, hence King Ghidorah's inclusion.
The funny thing is, I feel Varan, with his flight ability, could actually be made into a cool monster if he appeared in a better movie, keep in mind that Anguirus was pretty lame on his debut as well, but he went on to be popular with fans, but as things stand, the unbelievable one will have to live with the fact that Americanisation killed his, already pretty poor, career, and I can't help but picture him sittig in a Kaiju bar drowning his sorrows next to the original Gamera rogues gallery and Guilala. Varan the Unbelievable probably doesn't even deserve 1/5, and unlike most other Kaiju Eiga that I would give that score to, it doesn't even have humour to fall back on, it's just plain bad.
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