Plot Details: This opinion reveals minor details about the movie's plot.
“How to Destroy a Super Hero Franchise in These Easy Steps” was the subliminal message hidden in the 1997 film Batman & Robin by director Joel Schumacher and the executives at Warner Bros. Actually, it wasn’t subliminal at all. It was that proverbial cream pie thrown into everybody’s faces as they watched this train wreck with their eyes wide open—closing your eyes would have been mercy killing.
Batman and Robin was a huge debacle even before it hit the screens and it all started when Joel Schumacher was still attached to the project on hand. His previous Batman Forever was critically panned despite the big numbers at the box office. Warner Bros. figured that maybe the formula would work again but that gamble backfired in their faces. This version of Batman practically destroyed his dark and mysterious mystique and went further down the path towards Camp Ivannapeeuke (by the way, enrollment was high to this camp for those scarred after watching the movie).
Ice, Ice Baby
It has been a common theme in all Batman movies that the villains usually get the centre stage treatment, and Batman & Robin is no exception to the rule. In fact the man who got top billing was the Governator himself.
Mr. Freeze: Ice to see you!
Arnold Schwarzenegger runs havoc on the streets of Gotham City as the cool Mr. Freeze. I found him to be a very poor choice for this role and my fears were confirmed when I saw him on screen. His performance could not convince me that he was a scientist and a super-villain. And his corny dialogue didn’t help his case much as well ( I blame that on Akiva Goldsman, an Oscar winning screenwriter, no less). Interestingly enough, the motive to Mr. Freeze’s crime spree to save his wife was basically adapted from Batman: The Animated Series and really the only thing that made any sense in the movie.
Patrick Stewart was once considered for the role and I’m so grateful he wasn’t picked at all. This would have seriously tainted his reputation later on when the X-Men movie came out.
But do the producers stop at showcasing one villain. Not at all. “The more, the merrier” theme seems to be ingrained in their heads. Since Catwoman had a nice and dangerous sex appeal in Batman Returns, it was decided that perhaps it could work again with Poison Ivy. Uma Thurman is a beautiful woman and a great actress. If this was the first movie you ever saw her perform, it would not be the perfect impression of that skill. Pamela Isley has been genetically altered and has the ability to control all plant-form due to an accident at Dr. Jason Woodrue’s laboratory. She also has the ability to seduce and control any male species with her pheromones. This becomes disastrous to Batman and Robin’s relationship as she pits them against each other as they vie to win her affections.
And then there’s Ivy’s bodyguard, the muscle known as Bane. What a waste of a truly great character. I know Jeep Swanson was a wrestler but they didn’t have to make his character so stereotypical to his nature. It’s an insult to the character of Bane, the man who combines intelligence, cunning and super-human strength. Basically, he’s the equivalent of Lex Luthor on steroids, or, in his case, the steroid-pumping serum known as “Venom”. Bane is the man who deduced Batman’s identity, broke his back and put him out of commission for a year. The movie version of Bane is nothing like his comic book counterpart. In fact Bane wasn’t even necessary and became a throwaway character. This became evident as he followed his predecessors’ fate—The Joker, The Penguin and Two-Face—in the end.
The Dysfunctional Bat Family
George Clooney got the call the pick up and wear the mantle of the Bat. Bad move, George. Did you not see Batman Forever? No offense to Clooney because he is a good actor, but he doesn’t make a good superhero. At least not a good Batman. I thought he was a better Bruce Wayne than Val Kilmer but that’s about it. Mercifully, this was the last live-action Batman film Warner Bros. decided to produce for a while, and with good reason. I also bet Clooney was looking for a way to get out of his three-picture deal to play the Dark Knight after this fiasco. At least he owned up by saying that he may have single-handedly been responsible for the demise of the franchise. It’s nice of you to say that, George, but the blame isn’t yours. It was already dead before you came on board.
Chris O’Donnell still irritates me as Robin. He doesn’t work for me at all and his character development was even worse than the previous film. The insolence and whiney attitude was grating against all senses of my body. The more he was on the screen, the more I wanted to smack him around. I’m still sticking to my guns by saying that Robin wasn’t needed yet, and that O’Donnell wasn’t meant for the role.
And then there is the introduction of Batgirl. I don’t know why they felt it was vital to put her in the movie but it did not work at all. Alicia Silverstone could not pull this role out of a hat if her life depended on it.
Michael Gough was great as Alfred Pennyworth as usual, and probably the only enjoyable part of the movie. In fact the central story revolved around him and trying to find a cure to a rare disease, something that Mr. Freeze knew.
And there were still those butt shots and armour-piecing nipples protruding from the body suits, even Batgirl’s.
Throughout the entire film, I was finally convinced that Schumacher was trying to create his own version of the 1960s television show. The problem was that, as cheesy as the television show was, it still had a certain charm. Batman and Robin had none of that. The critics demolished it, the fans spat on it, and the average Joe demanded their money back. In fact Clooney even said that if you met him and told him how much you disliked the film, he would personally refund your money as a means of an apology. That alone makes him stellar in my books.
Batman and Robin is an example of everything not to do when making a comic book movie. I’m sure this movie is sent to every director and producer wanting to make a superhero flick with the inscriptions “Study This and Do the Opposite” written in big, bold letters.
The film was so bad that it was nominated in almost every single Razzie category in 1998. Check out this list of the 1998 Razzie Award nominations:
• Worst Director: Joel Schumacher
• Worst Original Song: Billy Corgan (For the song “The End is The Beginning is The End”)
• Worst Picture: Peter Macgregor-Scott (producer)
• Worst Reckless Disregard for Human Life and Public Property
• Worst Remake or Sequel
• Worst Screen Couple: George Clooney & Chris O'Donnell
• Worst Screenplay: Akiva Goldsman
• Worst Supporting Actor: Chris O'Donnell
• Worst Supporting Actor: Arnold Schwarzenegger
• Worst Supporting Actress: Uma Thurman
And the winner of the Razzie goes to:
• Worst Supporting Actress: Alicia Silverstone
I’m surprised Batman & Robin only won one Razzie. It makes me extremely scared that there were even worse films and performances that came out that year (Kevin Costner’s “The Postman” topped that list).
I think Michael J. Nelson, in Mike Nelson's Movie Megacheese, said it best:
“Batman & Robin is not the worst movie ever. No, indeed. It's the worst thing ever. Yes, it’s the single worst thing that we as human beings have ever produced in recorded history.”
The Tim Burton/Joel Schumacher era came to an end and I think everyone finally breathed a sigh of relief.
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