I always believed that I would enjoy this film. Featuring the ultimate primal hunter going toe to toe with the ultimate in deadly prey was an idea that could not go wrong. Having read the books, seen the art work and somewhat played the game I also had faith that if anyone could understand how to film this then it would be the director of Mortal Kombat. Sure he may have messed up Resident Evil, but this film was about a battle between 2 monsters, would have to be a none stop effects bonanza and as such was perfect for his directing style.
OK so the results are certainly not perfect. The start of the story where a satellite detects a heat signature and a group of specialists are called together to investigate a pyramid beneath the north pole is dragged on for to long. It's like Anderson is trying, and failing, to establish his characters in the same way that Scott did in the original Alien. However by the time our team have made their way into the pyramid and become trapped in the middle of a battle between 2 warring Alien species then the fun really begins.
OK so I admit that I was still disappointed by the film. The screenplay seems to have been written by people who have never watched either series, nor read any of the Alien Vs Predator stories that the film is supposed to be based on. The Predators seem to have no problems hunting unarmed people; the aliens gestate, hatch and grow in minutes, and just what the hell is Charles Bishop Weyland doing as a main character hundreds of years before he appeared in Alien 3. There's never any explanations as to why a young predator would be blooding itself without an elder around, nor why they would come to earth when the hunting of humans is forbidden for the unblooded.
In fact plot holes were not the only things to rear their ugly heads. There was also the shallow characters, a lot of them, and bad actors to bring them alive too. Whether it's Ewen Bremner's lack of believable paternal feelings as the poor man who wont stop talking about his kids, Colin Salmon's completely unintimidating performance as the big bad marine, or the lack of anything resembling strength from Ripley wannabe Sanaa Lathan, you're bound for disappointment. Only Lance Henriksen delivers what you expect in his wonderfully hammy performance as the sick company owner Bishop.
Even Anderson's direction is not as slick as I was hoping. His editing is so MTV, so hyperactive that you as the audience member begin to feel dizzy. The action scenes just end up jumping about so much that you find following said action to be nearly impossible and as a result any suspense is nearly none existent.
However the fact remains that in spite all of that I still had fun. These two species have survived the years based on their screen presence, and even in this changed form that presence is unmatched. The effects used to create these species are amazing and rarely show any of the seems between what is real and what is fake. As such there is undoubtedly some primal pleasure to be had in seeing the 2 go toe to toe on the big screen. Seeing Predators throwing Aliens by the tails, having the Aliens sneaking through shadows and impaling the Predators, it's all just so exhilarating. Even without any really graphic gore this remains true. I'll admit that it was badly made, but I had fun, so sue me.
You knew this day would come. My first entry into Tom's Lean-N-Mean III Writeoff.
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